Thursday, August 30, 2007

Flash & Boom

Around 2:00 this morning, I was awoken by random flashes of bright light & a whole lot of grumbling....no, it wasn't my hungry tummy complaining that the rustic, yet gourmet PB&J sammich I nibbled on (7 hours earlier) wasn't enough to keep me satisfied....maybe I was dreaming.....or maybe I was having a stroke...

Worried, I started to pray to Zeus Vishnu Buddha the Little Baby Jebus: Please, if I'm about to be stricken down with a stroke, please show some compassion & let it only paralyze my left side of the body....I need the use of my right hand...to umm....turn the pages of the Bible & write all of those tithing checks to my local synagogue mosque church.

Silly me, I wasn't having a stroke at all....it was Thundering 'n Lightning....gasp....in L.A.???....during the summer?....well, it only rained a little bit....not even enough to wash my filthy car ....oh well.... I only hope that we'd get a little more of it, as we're pretty much in a drought condition right now.

So I'm about to look the gift horse in the mouth here & say: "damn you rain gods....you kept me up all night & only allowed me to have 4 hours sleep, but thanks for listening to my prayer....my right hand appreciates it".

8 comments:

Silly Billy said...

That is why I do everything with my right hand, except, ummmm, turn the pages of the bible. That I do with my left hand.

So in case HIM above determines that he will punish me for my sins and causes my much used right side to go paralyzed, I can still, uhhh, turn the pages of the bible.

Eric said...

Hmm. I'm going to start calling it "tithing" from now on.

J. David Zacko-Smith said...

Lordy you is a funny fella! Sexy too, I bet!

jay said...

Hmm, time to start practicing using my left hand.

Scot said...

Billy and I are much alike with our dexterity....

SYNRGY said...

I usually switch when I want to feel like I'm dating someone new... Oh come on people I haven't had sex n 7 months and my last date was in February... Let me have this one thing!... ;)

Steve said...

If I were to have a stroke, jeebus just may smite my by making my left hand useless. You see, I turn the pages of the bible with my left hand. Ha! Have a great weekend.

Christopher said...

Billy & Scot: I'd like to see a live demostration on just exactly how that works...

Syn: you made me LOL...for real!

Eric: are you generous with your tithing?

Steve: glad to see that you're reading the bible. [wink]

Jay: I've tried...but quickly gave up...just wasn't the same.

JDZS: back at ya my friend!