Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Looking Back at '08

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I can't believe how quickly 2008 has gone by. This year has been a tough one for me both financially & emotionally. I'm really glad to see it go, yet I'm cautiously optimistic as to what 2009 has in store for me.

In 2008, I reconnected with a long lost friend, hurt a very close friend (by telling him the painful truth), met a few bloggers face-to-face, saw one of my favorite bands in concert (Yazoo), vacationed in London & Paris, and recently acted so foolish that I may have ended the best thing I have.

I want to go far away and forget my worries for awhile, but the real world just won't allow that. I have too many responsibilities. I'm considering taking a break from blogging for a week or 2, just to get my head cleared a bit. I'll keep you all posted.

On that unhappy note...

To all of my Friends: I wish you all Happiness, Love, and Prosperity in the New Year...May it be a good one for all of us!
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Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Time Out

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Time Out from the World...

Leaving it All...
Just for a Day...




Time Out From The World by Goldfrapp
(set to a Final Fantasy game)...I think.
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Monday, December 29, 2008

Holiday Wrap Up

I had a really nice Christmas holiday, spent with my family & friends. The gifts were pretty minimal this year, and I have to admit that I was a little saddened that my tree wasn't drowning in a sea of wrapped presents (as it usually is). It took the wisdom of a child to remind that the Xmas isn't about gifts, but it's about family & food...and that's the point where I said "you're right" and then inhaled a Christmas cookie. Oh, how I ate, and ate, and ate all week long.

My family celebrates Crimbo on the 24th, so I was able to drive up north to spend the 25th with Paul (yay!). Per another family tradition, we had Chinese food for dinner on Christmas night....then I got to unwrap Paul's package...Mmm, the gift that keeps on giving.....wheee!

The rest of the weekend was spent shopping for after-Christmas sales, returning gifts, redeeming gift cards, unwrapping Paul's package many times more, and plenty more eating! [burp!]....I managed to buy more Xmas decorations and now my house is even more Christmas-y than before the 25th.

I hope everyone had a holly jolly merry jingley Christmas!

P.S....I am a little disappointed in the Workplace Gift Fairy. All I wanted from that b*tch was the new keyboard I requested 3 weeks ago, but she didn't come through. The letter "F" doesn't work properly (you need to bang on it a few times) so lately, writing emails is a bit of a chore...and y'all know how import that letter is! So to that, I say: " _uck You Gift _airy ! "

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas !

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Merry Christmas to all of my friends & readers!



Tuesday, December 23, 2008

All About MeMe


Shirley tagged me to complete this 6 pack meme...it's about time he throws me some damn attention!

Here's how you play:

1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. Let each person know they've been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up.


- - Six Random Things About Me - -

1. Almost every single bath towel in my home is from a hotel that I've visited. I'm not ashamed of that at all. I look at it like this: If the maid wasn't sneaky enough to go through my luggage every morning, then it's the hotel's fault for hiring such lousy spies...and c'mon, all of those clean towels just laying around in the bathroom...how could I resist?

2. I've never "done" any type of illegal drug. As a child, I witnessed way too many of my family members (basically uncles) making fools of themselves/getting arrested, for being high on some type of illegal substance or another. I guess I should thank them actually for being such drug deterrents.

3. I faked having the big "O" once (yes, with another man). Hey, I was much younger, way drunk, and just wanted to sleep off the drinks. I was so proud of my acting skills, that is, until I was busted a few days later when the guy called to ask me out on another date, and when I accepted he said, "ok, but this time I want you to c*m for real".

4. When I was a child (6 or 7?), my mother sneakily made cow's tongue for dinner. I loved it. She told me it was beef. Then my b*tch sister went into the garbage and pulled out the packaging that the tongue came in and said "yes it is, but look at what kind of beef it is"....then my Dad added that "my secondary tongue should start to grow in a couple of hours"...he also let me know that the taste buds at the back of my tongue were evidence that the tongue was already starting to grow. I balled like a baby, called my grandma who told me the truth and then told my parents off for being so cruel.

5. I knew I was gay, since I was in kindergarten. I don't think I knew the word "gay" or what that meant, but I did know that I liked boys and I especially liked wrestling with my friend Chad, in my backyard.

6. The first porno I ever watched was at a lesbian's house, while baby-sitting their 2 children. The femme lesbian was divorced and had kids from that marriage. The porno was a straight one and was kinda creepy. The guys all wore cheap devil masks and the women were "angels". I was a late bloomer, and up until then had never seen another man's penis. I remember being so impressed by how well endowed all the men were and wondered if that was how big my hairless wang would get in a couple of years....sadly, the answer to that question was "no".

So there you go...don't you all feel even closer to me now? I'm going to break the rules and not tag anyone else (I'm in a lazy mood). Feel free to complete this meme if you want.

Dreamt A Little Dream

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I received the above pic in an email from a workplace friend this morning. Cute, no?

The ironic thing is that I had a dream last night involving a cow. In the dream, I was in my bed (alone....sigh) and I woke up just before the alarm went off. [I hate it when that happens in real life.] Anyhoo, I started to drift back to sleep, when a cow pushed his head through my bedroom window. I pretended to be asleep, hoping he'd look around, disapprove of my bedroom stylings and leave. But no, instead, he started to lick my hair and make purring sounds like a cat does.

Then my Dad burst into my bedroom, (looking like he did when he was my age, which sorta weirded me out) yelling in Spanish, with a garden hose in his hand. He yelled over at his shoulder "Now Pendeja, turn it on now! "

So, the cow gets a face full of water and leaves my window. It's at this point that I wake up...and realize that I've wet myself, kidding, ONLY KIDDING!

Still trying to figure this dream out.
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Monday, December 22, 2008

O Tannenbaum

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As per my usual procrastinator style, I FINALLY bought our Christmas tree over the weekend. It's very fresh and was still a little wet in the middle.

Here are a few pics of the tree:

Bare Naked Tree !

All Dressed Up!

This pic above & the one below get bigger when you click on them, the others don't. What's going on Blogger?!

Merry Christmas, Murr Chrimuh, and Happy Crimbo to all my Friends (real, imaginary, and/or of the blogosphere persuasion) !!

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Thursday, December 18, 2008

Decisions, Decisions

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Pomegranate NS08


My new BFF Kyle, (back off cb!) tipped me off to a new phone, that has me seriously questioning my wanting of a G1 phone.

Check out this bad boy at this website, and be prepared to be blown away by all of the cool things that it can do. You'll thank me later !

I....WANT...A...POMEGRANATE...MARTINI...PHONE !
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Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Supercalifragilisticexpealidocious

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During my morning commute to work, I was listening to NPR on the radio. I like listening to this station because it makes me feel well informed and kinda smart. Except for today. So many of the segments had reporters using really big words that made my head hurt. Then I became angry.

I was listening to this Smarty Pants commentator going on about how if you are a rich bastard have not been affected financially by the current recession, then you're not doing the U.S. economy any good by pinching pennies...instead, you should be out shopping right now. The Scrooge in me has a tough time swallowing (don't go there) this, but I see his point...kind of.

Anyhoo, he used a phrase ["the ethos of austerity it produces can trap us in the doldrums"] that made me roll my eyes, flip off my radio, and literally YOL (Yell Out Loud): "Who actually talks like that?!". Apparently, not me. I do know what each of those words means, but I'd never be able to string together a phrase like that, without first consulting someone from 1888.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a dictionary to read.
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

RuPaul Obama

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RuPaul poses as both first Lady Michelle & President-Elect Barack Obama...aww, the power of PhotoShop!
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Monday, December 15, 2008

Party Party


This past weekend was so much fun, that I just didn't want it to end.

On Saturday, I threw a birthday party for my oldest daughter, Lauren, who just turned 18. [So, how old does that make me?] It was a very relaxed, casual affair, with my folks, my 2 brothers, some friends, and Paul stopping by.
Before the party started, I took my 2 girls and Lauren's BFF to a really cute spa/nail salon for a mini spa day. That gave me time to decorate the house, pick up the cake & the food, and to throw myself together.

Saturday was the first time that Paul had met my family, and I was slightly worried that my family would scare Paul away. They can be a little crazy at times, but in the good, fun, kind of way. Funny thing is that my family & Paul clicked just fine. Paul even got a hug from mama when they left, and she isn't the hugging type. I have to say that I am a little disappointed in both Paul & my Mom. They were supposed to have a "Battle of the Bowels" fart-off, but they were both out of ammunition. Party Poopers!

After the family left, the rest of us went to Naples (area in Long Beach that has homes I will never be able to afford, with canals running through their front yards) to watch the boat parade. We got there too late for the parade, so instead of oohing and awwing at yachts decked out in Xmas lights, we walked the canals and gawked at the gorgeous houses. It seemed like every house was throwing a party. We could have easily walked into any house, grabbed some food & drink, and sashayed on out without anyone questioning us. But I'm chicken shit, so we didn't. I took my camera to snap some pics, but snapping did not happen. Ironic, no?



Oh, for Lauren's birthday present, I bought her a G1 Phone.
I....WANT.....ONE....!!! It does so many cool things. My favorite thing is that it can scan anything that has a bar code on it and tell you what it is, how much it costs locally, and where you can buy it from. So flippin cool!

Sunday was spent relaxing and decorating the house for Crimbo. Pictures to follow soon.
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Sunday, December 14, 2008

Skin Tight

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I have the exact same shirt as the model is wearing in the pic above, but it just doesn't look as good on me...le sigh.
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Friday, December 12, 2008

A Day Without Shampoo

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I'm pleased as punch (who came up with that lame expression, and why am I still using it here if I think it's lame....I digress) that I did my part this past Wednesday for the national Day Without A Gay protest. No, I didn't call in Gay to work, but I made the difficult decision not to blog...and ironically, I did the same thing the following day.

This morning I attended a really informative 2-hour meeting from a client that my company is trying to seduce into doing some business with us. There were about 50 employees attending this meeting, and I noticed a trend with some of the attendees. There were about 10 people that had oily, greasy, dirty, and/or flaky hair. I know it's casual Friday today, but damn, not so casual that you neglect your hygiene.

When it came time for the Q&A portion of the meeting, some of these pigs thought it would be cute to stand up to ask a question, you know, so that everyone else could notice just how dirty their hair actually was. I was floored. You'd think that the last thing they'd want to do is to draw any more attention to themselves with a head full of oil. Apparently not. One lady, who stands out in my mind, looked like she started to curl her dirty hair, but the curling iron must've burst into flames and she just said "aww, screw it, that ONE large unbrushed curl looks kinda cute"....no it doesn't.

Ten out of 50 people is 20 percent. How embarrassing. I can already imagine what the client's conversation will be about, on the drive to the airport: "What was up with all of the people in the audience that didn't shower today?".

On a brighter note, my hair was looking (and still is) all kinds of F-I-E-R-C-E...and clean too!

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Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Big Pimpin'

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Back in October, my Boo lost interest in the wonderful world of blogging and ended up deleting his blog. Today, I'm happy to announce that the bitch is back. Please stop on by his little piece of the blogosphere (click here) and show the stud some love...but not too much, he's mine bitches!

Welcome back Babe!
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Monday, December 8, 2008

I'm a Bed Breaker, Baby!

What? It's Monday already? Meh!

Well, as far as weekends go, mine was fan-tast-dick ! The highlight was going to a Christmas dinner party that Paul's workplace threw for all of their employees. It was held at a Marriott Hotel. The food was damn tasty, the drink tickets were generous, and the raffle prizes were mouth watering (we didn't win a thing though).

After dinner, we drove around for a little bit, looking at some of the mansions in the area that were already decked out for Christmas. Then it was back to Paul's place, where we got our groove on and broke his bed.

No, I'm just kidding, we actually broke the bed before we went to the dinner.....wheeee!

On Sunday, I tried to get the house decorated for Christmas (as I'd been planning to the entire week before), but only managed to put a wreath on the front door. I took one look at the garage and got the sudden urge to light it all on fire and start from scratch, but I'm cheap so that didn't happen. I'll probably start today when I get home from work. Maybe I can bring a glittery candle or two into the house. Decorating is hard y'all.

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Friday, December 5, 2008

Boy George Facing Jail Time

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A jury found Boy George guilty of falsely imprisoning male escort Audun Carlsen.

Via Dailymail.co.uk :

Boy George faces jail next month for falsely imprisoning a rent boy at his flat. The openly gay 80s singer was told in court today that custody was 'the most likely option' after a jury convicted him of handcuffing Norwegian male escort Audun Carlsen to a wall at his flat in Shoreditch. The 46-year-old singer, whose real name is George O'Dowd, also beat Carlsen, 29, with a metal chain as he tried to escape from his flat in east London after a kinky photographic session, Snaresbrook Crown Court heard.

Mr Carlsen fled in just his underpants as dawn broke and he alerted police. O'Dowd handcuffed Carlsen to a wall while, he claimed, he investigated whether he had tampered with his home computer on April 28 of last year.

He accused Mr Carlsen of taking photos of himself from his laptop, taken by O'Dowd when the pair met three months earlier. O'Dowd denied to police that he punched or assaulted Mr Carlsen or swung a chain at him as the escort fled the flat, and suggested the bruises Mr Carlsen sustained could have been due to the fact that he was HIV positive.

Read the full article here


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Just Dance; For Free @ Ikea


Lady GaGa will be performing a concert in San Diego for free this Sunday (12/07/08 @ 1:00 pm)...she's chosen an interesting venue to perform in...the IKEA parking lot...that should be interesting!


To get into the "concert venue" to watch her perform, Lady is asking that you bring a new, unwrapped toy. Wish I could make this show, but I can't! Grrr!!


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Thursday, December 4, 2008

Lit Tree

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Last night, the lighting of the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center (in NYC...duh!) took place...wishing I was there to witness this beauty...maybe next year.


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Wednesday, December 3, 2008

I Dream of Gnocchi !

So today is Day 3 of my "no carbs" diet. It's really not that bad, since I'm basically just eating loads of meats & eggs....but I am noticing that the 2 things I'm missing the most (breads & pasta) are all around me...especially at the place where I'm at my weakest, the workplace. I walked into the office today to be greeted by a coworker with a basket full of fresh pumpkin bread....Oh Devil, how you tempt me!!

I went to the gym last night, just for shits-n-giggles, and I actually did giggle when I walked through the men's locker room. There was an elderly gentleman posing in the mirror, wearing only a pair of red speedos....oh yeah, and under the speedos, he was DEFINITELY wearing a diaper. There was no way that his old ass was that lumpy. At first I felt bad for the old fart, but then I thought, nah, he should know better than to wear speedos over a diaper.

I thought about this man on my drive home and I started to get a little jealous. I'd love to be able to wear a diaper and just shit myself whenever nature called...what a relief that must be. No more panicking while out in public, desperately looking for a clean restroom.

Suddenly, the future got just a little brighter!

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Monday, December 1, 2008

Holiday Weekend Recap


I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving holiday...I did!

I drove up to my parent's house Thursday morning, and it took me 3 hours to drive the 85 miles to their house....the traffic was unreal! Of course, I managed to eat way too much, despite my plan to "eat like an European"...the American in me took over at the dinner table. After dinner, we went to the local casino to fight off the effects of sleepy turkey-ness....a few hours later, I walked out with $50 more in my pockets...wheeeeeeee !!!

Birthday boy caught off guard...Chris, it's a cute pic so I'm not removing it b*tch!

I was able to spend a couple of days this weekend with my man Paul, his boys (one of which is almost as tall as me...grrr!), and some friends. Saturday night our group of six amigos drove down to Studio City to celebrate Chris' birthday and to get our drink/dance on. I suggested we check out Club Fuel before heading on over to Oil Can Harry's, since neither of us had ever been there before, and it was within walking distance...what a mistake that was.


Drunk Betches!

The promoters at Club Fuel just seemed waaaay too desperate to satisfy their customers...I lost count of how many times we were asked if we were "having a good time". I'm guessing it was a new promoter working the club that night, because I must've heard from 3 different managers/employees on our way in that there were "FIVE go-go boys tonight"...and "boys" was right. I think I was either as tall, if not taller than each of the go-go boys that were there...and I'm a towering 5'8".


As our group was settling in on the sofas, trying to warm up & get comfortable, the managers started to send us different go-go boys that would each suggest (in VERY broken English) that we should all go dance. I ab-so-fuc-king hate it when someone comes up to me at a club and asks why I'm not dancing...and then tells me to go dance. My ass will hit the floor when I'm good & tipsy, f*ck you very much! After a drink or 2, we decided to cut our losses & we left for Oil Can Harry's just down the street., where we disco danced the night away.

Paul & his lucky BF

After a fun 4-day weekend, it was seriously hard to get motivated for the new work week !