Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Intervention Now!

Good Lord!...Check out those arms...it looks like a walking biology demonstration on what the human muscular system looks like...yikes!

How can anyone look at that & think that it's a good look....that's overkill....Madonna, please take a day off from the yoga/pilates classes...we get it...you're extremely fit.

This frightening pic comes courtesy of Big Daddy & The Notorious J.O.E.

Monday, July 30, 2007

Sake Sipping, Sunshine Watching & Island Dancing

The alarm clock went off this morning, just as I was about to "get the guy" in another one of my Technicolor Fag Fantasies....sigh...

The weekend went by way too fast....just exactly what did I do the last couple of days?...well, I did myself...thrice, but let's not go there...

Last Friday, our manager let us leave early from work (at noon) to show his appreciation for all of the hard work/long hours we've completed recently...so my weekend started off a little but earlier....wheeee!

I had no plans for the weekend & spent it running errands, went to the gym, pleasured myself (thrice), got a haircut, etc...

I did have Sushi with the GBF Friday night, at Aki Sushi Bar (sorry, no website) in Long Beach...I ordered one of the Sashimi combo plates & we shared a bottle of Sake. I can't even remember the last time I had sex on a mattress sake, but I really enjoyed it (the sake)....afterwards, we saw the movie Sunshine. Interesting movie, but the ending left me a little depressed...

What better way to lift my spirits than to get smashed at a local bath house gay bar?

I have to say that the gay bar/nightclub scene in Long Beach really is pitiful. Back in 2002, the place to be was at Club Fire Island. It was this small dance club in a part of the LBC that you wouldn't want to voluntarily reside in.... F.I. (as it was known) played loud house music, sold cheap drinks and didn't charge a cover. I clocked a lot of hours there, shaking my ass with some very hot mens. Many a hookup was made here....oh, how I miss this place!

Sadly, the owners were bought out by Walgreens a couple of years later... F.I. tried out another location in Long Beach, but lost its homo-mojo and F.I.2 didn't last very long. Honestly, they lost their regulars by making the mistakes of charging a cover, raising their drink prices & playing trance / global / ambient music...(no more House music)...pfft!

Well kids, that's the highlight of my thrilling weekend...now it's back to the grind...deep sigh!

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Triple D

Dylan Vox (hottie in the pic above) is set to star in a new musical, based on the classic 1970's porn flick, Debbie Does Dallas. Can you believe it?...they actually made it into a musical!

According to the musical's press release:
"DEBBIE DOES DALLAS: The Musical is a modern morality tale told as a comic
musical of tragic proportions in the language of the raunchy burlesque. The show
is the coming-of-age story of an all-American small-town sweetheart named Debbie
Benton. Debbie is captain of her high-school cheer leading team, but she dreams of making it to the big time by becoming a Texas Cowgirl Cheerleader. When Debbie receives a letter telling her she has qualified for the professional squad, the only thing that stands between her and the realization of her dream is bus fare to the big city: Dallas."
Some of you may know Dylan Vox as gay porn star, Brad Benton....and others (me) may know him as the friendly cocktail server at one of my favorite WeHo hotspots, East-West Lounge. I should also mention that Dylan has also starred in the homo-erotic TV series "The Lair" & "Dante's Cove".

The musical production is scheduled to happen every Thursday, beginning August 2nd, at the Key Club. Doors open at 8:00 p.m. Ticket prices are: $35.00 - $55.00....Tickets are available now through Ticketmaster, or by calling 310-274-5800.

Word Up: following each performance, there'll be an after-party with the Debbie cast at DeGENERATION (L.A.'s newest SECRET party at the Key Club). Admission to the party is FREE when you show your "Debbie" ticket stub. Rumor has it that some of the hottest local DJ's will be spinning....I'm-a gonna have to check this one out.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007


Saturday night, I attended the screening of RuPaul's new movie Starrbooty, at the 2007 L.A. Outfest Film Festival. I was hoping to see this with the Intern & his man, but they weren't interested in seeing this movie & they ended up watching something else Saturday afternoon. I'm not sure what they actually saw, as I called in sick Monday and haven't seen him since Friday.

I was pretty ignorant as to how Outfest worked. I thought it was going to be all at one location, showing different queer movies every couple of hours or so...when in fact, it's a bunch of venues scattered about L.A.

I went with my GBF, and I think I ended up liking the movie more than he did. Here's a little writeup that describes what the movie's about (from the Starrbooty website):

When supermodel/agency operative Starrbooty learns her niece has been kidnapped by her archrival, Annaka Manners, Starrbooty's only option is to go undercover as a street hooker to rescue her. The only snag in our heroine's plan is that in order to infiltrate the prostitution underworld she has to gain street credibility by going "all the way" with the johns. This time, deep cover threatens to unravel Starrbooty at her very core because this time, not only is it personal but she also discovers secrets about her true identity that she wasn't supposed to know.

Starrbooty is sexy, sassy and salacious.

This movie is jam-packed with delicious dialogue, insane characters, outrageous costumes and gratuitous hair and make-up. RuPaul says: "The goal here was to make an exploitation film that was part Russ Meyer, John Waters and "The Naked Gun" and we succeeded."

While we were getting the car parked, I was debating on whether or not to bring my camera along & ended up leaving it in the car (I didn't want to look like a tourist)...besides, I didn't think that RuPaul or anyone else famous would be showing up....Boy, was I wrong.

As I was waiting in the concession line for a Diet Coke, I heard the queens in the lobby gasp in unison...RuPaul had just arrived & my damn camera was in the car! Arrggh!...She spent about 20 minutes taking pics with some of the fans...and my camera was in the car!

The Amazonian drag queen, decked out in a floor length, colorful sequined gown & white afro wig, was accompanied by the director of the movie, Mike Ruiz (see pic below)...hubba hubba!

This movie was hilarious, hysterical, over the top, and includes kung-fu fighting, impromptou dance routines, and a whole bunch of full-frontal male nudity from some gay porn stars (hello Michael Lucas!)

Starrbooty is a definite nod to Blaxploitation films, and I think even Pam Grier would be proud.

There's a whole lot of funny one liners, and some of the follow up quips were lost whenever the audience went wild with laughter (which was quite often).

If you get a chance, check this movie out!

Monday, July 23, 2007

Cake Eater

This past weekend was full of cake eating. On Friday night, my GBF (Gay Best Friend) brought over a lemon bundt cake & a bottle of Pinot Grigio....both items disappeared in record time. When I went into the kitchen to get my "second" slice I was shocked (and shamed) to discover that we had eaten the entire cake....oh, the shame!

Saturday afternoon found me shoving birthday (no, not mine) cake into my mouth...I'd like to give a shout out to Rossmoor Pastries, in Signal Hill, for making one of the best damn cakes I've ever had...for real: layers of MOIST chocolate cake with layers of strawberry Bavarian cream, and topped off with buttercream frosting. I think that if I was on Death Row, this would be my requested last meal....yes, it was that good...that, or I'm still on a sugar high.

I tried to make it up to my waistline, by hitting the cardio hard on Sunday morning...hopefully, I worked off some of the frosting (from Friday's cake) at least...I'll work off the rest of the cake this week.

Confession: I have two very large slices of B-day cake in my fridge right now...and they're calling me....it's getting hard to resist them...maybe I should just trash them & remove the temptation....or maybe I should rub them all over my body & lick every crumb off...

Ok, that visual sickened me enough to kill the urge to eat the cake.....see, it's all about visualization kids!

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

My Eyes Have Been Opened

Well, y'all know about the crush I have on our summer intern. He's been helping me out a lot lately by doing some very much needed & appreciated clerical stuff that I'm just too damn good to do my own self. Yesterday afternoon found us sitting at my desk, side by side (so close that his muscley arm kept rubbing against my withering arm) to spot check numbers that we were about to publish. I was so turned on by his touch, that a certain part of me was trying to stand up & salute him. Seriously though, it's been great getting to work so close with him over the last couple of weeks, as I've gotten to know him as a person & not so much as an object of my deep, dark desire.

We just got back from lunch, which was VERY enlightening. On the ride back to the office, we talked about what we were going to do this weekend. I shared that there's a lunch party that I'll be trying to hook up at attending on Saturday. He shared that there was an L.A. Movie Festival that he was going to go to over the weekend......with his Boyfriend!....When the word "Boyfriend" rolled out of his mouth my internal voice was screaming; "Oh My Gah! did he just say what I think he did ??!!... Oh My Gah....I want to go down on him so badly !!!"....but on the outside, I played it smooth & cool, as if I already knew.

Ahhh...that made me so happy that I wanted to kiss him right on the lips (with tongue), but that probably would've gotten me a fist in the face (don't go there with that filthy "fisting" comment.....it's too easy ).....To clue him in that I'm also "family", I said that I'd forgotten about the Fest this weekend (that was a straight up lie, as I had no idea it was this weekend), but that I wanted to go too. To further improve my chances of getting to dry hump his leg, he said: "Dude, we should like totally meet up this weekend & go, if you're free"...I agreed (like totally).

p.s....I scored his digits...let the stalking commence!

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Senseless Suggestion

Normally, on my drive home form work I multi-task to pass the time....and by multi-tasking, I'm not only talking about the usual nose picking or ball scratching, but I'll sometimes call friends, make dinner reservations, order a pizza, call an escort service, etc....well, last night I called up T-Mobile to switch call plans. Currently, I'm on a 600 any time minutes/unlimited night & weekends plan (for $39.99)....this works for me, as I do most of my personal calls during the day from my work phone....I have gone over my 600 minutes a few times but not by much.

But, I heard about T-Mobile's 1000 any time minutes/unlimited night & weekends plan (for $39.99), so decided to switch over. I must've called after hours, as I ended up speaking to an Indian woman with an extremely thick accent. I had to ask her twice to repeat her name. Her name was Eunice....ahem. Now come on...if Big Business is going to outsource to India, fine...but why make the call center folks use false, CORNY American names?

Anyhoo....Gita Eunice tried to talk me out of switching plans, as it would force me into a new 2-year contract. I was cool with that, but she advised that I remain on the current plan & once a week call in to check how many minutes I've used to date (so that I don't go over my allotted 600 minutes).....hmmm.....let me think about this: keep things as-is or get an additional 400 minutes at the same monthly rate & not having to call in weekly...gee, what should I do?

After I switched phone plans, I thought about calling one of my credit card companies to request a credit line increase (something I do every 6 months), but then I thought that the better idea would be to call in the morning when I could request that the real Eunice please stand up!

Monday, July 16, 2007

How I Lost 100 Pounds in One Week

Last week the j-o-b was seriously crazy y'all....I clocked so many hours of overtime (unpaid overtime -- due to being a salaried employee), that I should ask for a day off....soon. My apologies to my real world friends for blowing them off....don't go there....as well as to some of my blogging friends who've called to check in on me & I still haven't returned their calls....I should be punished, I know.

Over the last few weeks, I became quite proud of how everyone in my department came together during crunch time. My department was working like mad to make our Monday morning deadline....We took the concept of "teamwork" to a new level...even my manager showed a side of himself that I hadn't seen yet, and it was a nice change. As I walked out of my office LATE Friday night, it felt like 100 pounds of pressure & stress just dissolved. This week should be a helluva lot more relaxed. I might even get crazy & leave my office building at lunch for a quick fling in the park to grab a bite to eat.

Speaking of eating, I've been tracking my weight loss since the end of May, and I've sort of been a little flaky the last couple of weeks. I'm talking about being flaky in regards to NOT saying no to TWO slices of German Chocolate cake on Saturday, scarfing down a couple of cheeseburgers (2 separate occasions), and skipping out on the gym way too many times. With work getting back to normal, the diet, as well as the workouts should get back on track too.

On a positive note, I have lost enough weight that people in the office have noticed, and my favorite pair of baggy shorts (read: the only pair that fit comfortably) are now too loose to wear to the gym ....Yahooo!

Sunday, July 15, 2007

The Magical Movie

On Saturday, I caught the matinee showing of the latest Harry Potter movie. I read the book this movie is based on awhile back, and to be honest, I'd forgotten much of the story...that is, until I saw the movie and then it all came back to me....and then I started to notice all of the parts of the book that they left out. That's very forgivable though, as the book is seriously thick. The movie would've needed to be at least 4+ hours to cover all parts of the book.

It's amazing how much the crew has grown since the first movie. Friday night I couldn't sleep and found myself watching the first Harry movie on cable, and I couldn't believe how young the stars all were. This installment of the Harry Potter saga is much darker than any of the previous movies. Not going to give away any parts of the movie here, but I loved it & now I want to see it on an IMAX theater for the 3-D battle scene at the end of the movie.

Saturday night, Mama called to ask how I liked the movie...she said that she was looking forward to seeing Hairspray...then she admitted to wanting to see Jersey Boys as well...OMG...I think my mom is a big Theater Queen!....so, that's who I get it from!

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Tuesday, July 10, 2007


Last night, I stopped by the market to pick up something to fix for dinner....and boy am I glad I did...

As soon as I walked in, I spotted a hottie in the produce section....this young'n had me second guessing my gaydar....I just wasn't 100% sure whether he was straight or one of the select few...Here's a visual: Abercrombie classic good looks, wearing an athletic fit T-shirt (damn, those muscles were just the right size) & long shorts...

He passed by me as I was in the freezer section debating over French Vanilla or Plain Vanilla...As he walked by, I couldn't help but notice that he was sporting a raging boner. It was obvious that he was in a state of arousal and not just flopping around from going commando....Don't mistake me for a size queen here, but his tool wasn't very, ummm...long.

Being the horn dog investigative journalist that I am, I just had to check him out again, you know...to make sure my eyes weren't playing tricks on me....so I casually followed him into the bread section. He clearly had no interest in me, and I tried to play it off like I felt the same about him.... Yes, yes, y'all.....he was very much sporting wood.

I don't get it...if I have a woody & I'm out in a public (non-gay) establishment, I'm going to do everything possible to hide my boner...I'm curious as to what got him so excited? Maybe he took the Viagra too soon...or maybe it still hadn't worn off!

After dinner (and a huge Peanut Butter cookie) were digested, I went to the gym to get in 45 minutes of cardio....Now, at the Bally's in Long Beach, you have to walk through the Men's locker room to get to the staircase. As I was walking through the locker room, I noticed a short Asian dude toweling off near the entrance to the stairs....this happy man was also sporting wood....I swear, he was rock hard, weenie pointing straight up to heaven & oh so proud to show us all just what he's working with. I was impressed, yes, but c'mon! I mean what the hell's going on here?! Are we turning into Europe or am I just turning into a prude?!

Monday, July 9, 2007

Weekend Recap (& Workplace Rant)

I'm feeling a little cheated in regards to the weekend... I was supposed to have July 4th - 8th off, for a 5-day weekend, but I had to cancel my 2 days of vacation, due to the damn job.

Work has been crazy busy , as we're racing against the clock to meet our deadline for a major project... In June, I cancelled 3 vacation days & this past week I cancelled another 2 vacation days...I had plans to hang out with my SBF (Straight Best Friend), but had to cancel at the last minute....I'll have to make it up to him somehow (read: drunken blowjob)...

The upside of this is that I now have an additional week of time off available for later use.
I actually came in to work on Saturday morning & didn't leave until 7:00 pm, that's how bad things are...

So to salvage what little I had of my weekend, my GBF (Gay Best Friend) & I went to dinner at Cucina Picarelli Restaurant Saturday night...the food was great....portions were gigantic (read: my skinny jeans were screaming)....my GBF is a bit of a wine snob expert, and he brought along an amazing bottle of Barbera (sp?)....it was so good that I wanted to lick his bunghole my glass clean.

After dinner, the (original) plan was to head out to WeHo to check out this new hot spot, but after a bottle of wine, a full tummy & the work day, we decided to keep it local & just check out a movie. We saw Knocked Up....I didn't really want to see this, as I thought it was a chick flick, but got pressured persuaded to see it. It was pretty funny & I have a new found lust appreciation for Paul Rudd.

After the movie, there was just enough time for a couple rounds of drinky-drinks, so we stopped at Ripples....The place was packed at around 12:30 & there were a lot of new faces....One face in particular caught my eye...I was pulling out all the tricks, trying to catch his eye...you know: sucking in the gut...standing so that he couldn't see my profile....lifting my chin to minimize the secondary chins....but I think I needed to be 10 years younger and 20 15 10 pounds lighter for him to have been interested....


So here we go again with another crazy work week...as soon as I walked in to my cubicle this morning, I had someone waiting for me, 3 voicemails & a butt load of emails....uggh!

Thursday, July 5, 2007

And the Award Goes To......Me!

Rey, over at The Writings On The Wall, nominated me for a Thinking Blogger Award...

Wow!...that's really an honor...especially since I think of my blog as a mere creative outlet for this attention whore putting my snarky thoughts/opinions out into the blog-o-sphere, desperately hoping that someone will want to read it....so I'm truly grateful Rey!

Since I've been awarded, I have to play by the rules, and the rules say that if your ass is lucky enough to have received a Thinking Blogger Award, you have to:

  1. Write a post with links to 5 other "Thinking" blogs.
  2. Link to this post, so that the 5 tagged bloggers can find your written post.
  3. Optional: Display the above picture - linked to the exact origin of the meme.

So, here are my 5 Thinking Blog Nominees (Everyone on my Blogroll deserves this award, as I've got Damn Good Taste & only read the best, but I gotta play by the rules):

A Life in The Day -- I love this man's writing, especially his short stories...Stephen King, watch your back..here comes Greg!

Though Lovers Be Lost -- Jim is a writer who truly has the "Gift"... he's an amazing storyteller that has the ability to transport you into his tales & he just puts out some consistently excellent stuff!

Secrets of The Red Seven -- Sometimes I feel really stupid & ignorant after reading some of Eric's posts, because this one's so damn Smart & umm...non-ignorant!

WAT Central -- WAT's blog is a perfect balance of personal views, history lessons, entertainment reviews, & current events....and he'll occasionally showcase how large his feet are or how thick his beer can is.

Living My Life in NY -- Billy is a fairly recent discovery, yet there's something very familiar about this man...it's as if I'm reading a long lost friend's blog...definitely a daily read for me.

So there are my Five....If Rey hadn't nominated me in the first place, he'd definitely be on this list....make sure you stop by his place & check him out!

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Happy 4th of July!

Family's coming over for BBQ, beer, & apple pie...can't get more American than that!

Monday, July 2, 2007